Change of pace

Not to get all personal or anything, but I’m going to write about my emotions now.

Sorry.

You just can’t intellectualize some things, or even make them sound a little bit smart.

Oh well.

When we landed, my emotions became immediately trivial compared to coping with the logistics of cultural upheaval. You know: international ATM charges, conversion rates, what foods will ruin me, how to cross the street, figuring out when it’s OK to accept a stranger’s help or when trust will translate into a 30-minute tour of Aly Baba’s perfume shop.

But I’m settled now. I can think about personal stuff before bed. (Though I mostly use that time to read Twilight, no joke.) And in the van the other night, we got talking about gushy stuff. I took the opportunity to verbalize this one particular thing I’ve been reflecting on.

Right before I got on the plane at Logan, I experienced this crazy metamorphosis. It wasn’t profound. Pretty anticlimactic, actually. Unplanned, unannounced. I didn’t notice it until recently, even, in retrospect. But since May 2, I’ve been absurdly calm. Quiet inside. Unshakably present. Really, really peaceful and happy.

I can’t find a direct connection between those feelings and this trip. Instead, I’m filing it under “great coincidences,” because, for a generally anxious person, that emotional sea change gave me the chance to sink into my work and surroundings to an invaluable extent.

Egypt helps, too. There’s the inherently meditative quality of walking through a mosque, barefoot. And the city’s policy of zen-by-force: the competing sounds and smells of Cairo will pummel your Western sanity if you don’t mellow out.

And the people are great. They inspire me to take it slow and, as much as I hate to say this, because it’s an unfair luxury of a disconnected American, seeing the way so many Egyptians struggle puts life into perspective.

Finally, I’ve never been this far away from the people I love, which makes me realize, more and more every day, simply having them close is the best thing ever. Details are totally important, but mini points of contention are not.

A lot of things mean more than my narrow definitions of comfort and perfection. For once, that’s comforting unto itself.

Offering perspective

More elaborate updates later, but a quick note:

On June 4, Barack Obama will address the Muslim world from a pedestal in Egypt. Like the rest of the international community, Egypt seemed to derive a lot of hope from Obama’s victory. In turn, many Egyptians have told us they’re excited for his visit.

At AUC, we encountered some healthy skepticism – if not a hint of disenchantment with the world’s romantic portrait of America’s new president. Some of the students prefaced their less-than-spellbound perspectives with apologies. But really, we should all be holding our breath.

The first step to restoring America’s moral integrity, and polishing the grime off the word “patriotism,” was putting Obama in the White House.

The second step will be transforming a conversation about change into global evidence of change.

Which is why our AUC peers said they weren’t brimming with blind joy, they said. More important than the symbolism of Obama’s trip to Egypt will be the substance of his message.

“It’s nice that he’s coming to Egypt,” one girl said. “But of course, he has to address the Muslim world from somewhere in the Muslim world.”

That’s one view.

We gleaned another last night, talking over coffee with a group of Muslim Brothers.

There was more than a hint of disenchantment. In fact, they said they wished he would stay in America. Just not for the reasons you’d expect. For instance, not necessarily because of political discord or grievances with policy.

To secure its comfortable spot in America’s good graces, Mubarak’s regime adopted a more aggressive approach to debunking the popular opposition party since Obama announced his visit, said Mhamad Salim, 23. It’s a variation on the government’s age-old campaign to malign the Muslim Brotherhood, he said, and now, the group associates Obama’s visit with increased efforts to immobilize their efforts.

So one Egyptian’s sign of hope is another Egyptian’s cause for political persecution.

Another reminder that every story has multiple angles, and context can’t be ignored.